You Say You Want a Revolution

The following was originally posted on December 11, 2013 on Kristina's blog.

CHICKS ROCK! is happy to have Kristina back as a guest blogger this week. Kristina Leonardi is the founder of The Women’s Mosaic. She is a coach and speaker in the areas of career development, work/life wellness and personal growth.  

You can follow her @clearlykristina and like her Personal Growth Gab (PGG) page on Facebook to get more thought-provoking, inspirational and motivational tidbits like this!

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In memory of Grace Lee Boggs June 27, 1915 - October 5, 2015

One of the things I learned when I was negotiating was that until I changed myself, I could not change others .~ Nelson Mandela

Revolution is the evolution of humans into a higher humanity . ~ Grace Lee Boggs
                 

Those of you who know me or have been reading PGG for a while are aware that my passion and mission in life has always been to contribute to world peace, mostly through my work best expressed in my mantra that personal transformation is the key to social transformation.

So it should come as no surprise that I profoundly relate to and revere the lives of these two nonagenarians, Nelson Mandela who died last week at age 95, and the 98-year-old activist and author Grace Lee Boggs.  They literally embody this philosophy in every cell of their beings; they have demonstrated it externally with their activism and sacrifice for racial equality and social justice, and internally by the wisdom they have gained and generously share from nearly a century of experience, observation, and, most importantly, reflection.
  

Both started out as 'radicals', and were branded as terrorists with the requisite FBI/CIA files (Mandela was even on the US terrorism watch list until 2008!) because they initially saw the only way to overthrow the entrenched power structure was by employing the more literal and sometimes violent tactics of revolution through organized movements and a spirit of rebellion. But through trial and error, incarceration, and maturity, they eventually evolved; they gave themselves permission to change their minds, learn and grow in light of new information, experimentation and once again, reflection - ultimately coming to the conclusion that in order to change the world, they would have to change themselves.

They came to understand that indeed humanity is made up of humans and that humans were going to have to deal with other humans in order to get anything done. So we'd better be the best we can be as individuals and try to get along and get past our differences and disagreements, because the reality is that we must co-exist harmoniously - whether in a racially divided African country, a rundown bankrupt American city, or in your very own household.

We are living in extraordinary times, and it is no accident that you are who you are at this moment in history.

What does your humanity mean to you?  As our world continues to go through turbulent changes and upheavals, it will be up to us individually and collectively to do our part to 'tear down' where necessary and rebuild a more enlightened society that reflects our evolved humanity.  But we have to start with ourselves and do what we can in our immediate environments to demonstrate our own revolution - which, by the way, does not happen overnight or with a magic pill, silver bullet, or special app.

Only through keen observation, deep reflection, and inner and outer sweating effort and energy over a long period of time directed towards improving ourselves and serving others that true transformation can take place. Then, if we're lucky, by the time we reach our 90's we can look back and see how our journey has positively and productively unfolded in both a personal and political way, and be proud of what we accomplished and the legacy we will leave behind.

Wondering how it will all go down if you take up the cause? Give me a buzz and I will incite a riot in your heart to make the most of what you got, so at the end of the day you know it's gonna be alright!

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I am so grateful to have learned about and met Grace Lee Boggs just two years ago. 
She passed away yesterday at the age of 100. 

 Everyone should experience her wisdom and humanity so be sure 

check out the documentary or watch the many videos 

of her that can be found online. She is a national treasure who will be greatly missed, but whose legacy will live on in all the lives she touched.

Paradigm Shift NYC Presents “No Excuses: 9 Ways Women Can Change How We Think About Power” with Gloria Feldt, Feminist Icon

TWM is proud to be a Co-Sponsor of this Women's History Month event and honored that our founder, Kristina Leonardi will be one of the panelists.  Hope to see you on March 19th! 

Click here for more information and place to register.

About The Violence Against Women In India

Since I first learned of the 2012 case of the brutal Delhi gang rape, which gained international attention, I was disturbed to learn of the rise in reports of similar crimes perpetrated towards Indians and foreigners. It was the attack on a Danish tourist near a popular shopping area in India's capital city last month that really made my blood run cold. Through my own research, I learned of other horrific cases of rape in India that are almost too overwhelming to comprehend. Some of them include a case of a Polish woman raped with her young daughter present in a taxi cab by the driver; a couple ambushed by a group of men while bicycling in Central India; and a nightmarish account of a woman who was raped by order her village council as punishment for who she chose to love. I have read and been told by Indian family members and friends that the increase in reports of rape are a result of more people coming forward to the authorities and the media; fear of reprisals from the perpetrators and being ostracized by their communities continue to be serious deterrents to justice.

As the daughter of first generation Americans who came from India, I have had mixed feelings about the country. As a child, all I knew about India from my two visits there were that I had many Indian relatives, the climate was very hot and rainy, vegetation was lush, and I was a mosquito magnet.  It was only during my last two visits to India as an adult that I learned to appreciate its many cultures, languages, customs, climates and landscapes. Like America, India is more diverse and complex than most people can comprehend, including myself.  Now, however, I am wondering if I will return to my parents' birth country any time soon.

It's not just fear that something horrible will happen to me or someone I know; it's the corruption and misogynistic attitudes that make progress in the prevention of these attacks and the aftermaths faced by victims slower than it should be. There are many wonderful, outspoken Indian women and men in the country facing this issue head-on, and now with more people reporting these attacks, the need for true reform in all levels of society is more vital than ever. As an outsider with some insider knowledge, I see how influential the Indian movie and TV industries could be in transforming some of the sexist, backward attitudes that have contributed to the extreme violence towards women in the country. Strategies like public service announcements that reach out to men and women of all ages would be great, as well as more positive stories of rape victims becoming survivors could make enormous positive impacts.

There are so many other things that need to happen, such as dealing with how families raise their sons and daughters; encouraging all people to report cases of abuse to the authorities; and revising academic, governmental, and medical institutions' policies on how to help survivors and their families. Unfortunately, I have heard too many stories of people who are further victimized by their communities after going public, and for me, that is unacceptable.

True, systematic change will not happen overnight, but I hope to see some significant reforms in my lifetime. After all, India transformed from a British colony into a democracy with a flourishing economy in a matter of decades. I know (as do so many others) that changes in India's cultural, social, and legal policies regarding all forms of abuse must happen, so the nation's progress into a brighter future will become a reality.

TWM's Summer 2012 eNewsletter

If you're not already on our mailing list, we thought we'd share our latest enewsletter with you here.  Please click here for the full version.

Well, hello there!  We hope you are enjoying the summer and making the most of the transformative opportunities this year has presented. It's been a while since you've heard from us, and we thought that doing so on the tail of the XXX Olympiad and right before UN Humanitarian Day and Women's Equality Day was as good a time as any!

Since completing our 10 year anniversary with our celebration last July, we've been in transition deciding what we want the next decade of our existence to look like. In the meantime, we've offered three Visioning Workshops and continue to interact with you on a virtual basis via CHICKS ROCK!, Facebook and Twitter, so be sure you are connected with us there.

When we started TWM in January of 2001, the world was a very  different place. It was pre-9/11, there were still plenty of people without email or cell phones, and the majority of women's organizations were only profession, ethnic or issue specific.  We set out to encompass and embrace all that a woman could be, discovering her own identity by connecting with, learning about and being inspired by the diversity of women around her - and we produced over 100 unique events to help make that happen.

We've come a long way in terms of women's leadership, organizations that have since been created and the more mainstream understanding and hardcore research demonstrating that the empowerment of women and girls are key to making the world a better place. In other words, it's now common knowledge that when women and girls benefit, the entire planet does. It's very rewarding to know that we were a grass-roots part of that effort!

So having accomplished much of what we set out to do, yet knowing there is much more work to be done, we wanted to ask you: going forward, what is it that you would like to see TWM do more or less of?  What kind of programs do you want to participate in, on or off-line experiences you would like to have and existing needs we might be able to fill?  Send us your suggestions, feedback and comments via email or on Facebook.

Until then, we hope to see you at our upcoming workshops and we'll be sharing some video clips of relevant past events with TWM Flashbacks both here and in emails to come. If you're new to TWM, there are plenty of links in this newsletter to catch up on what we've been up to thus far. 

And last, but certainly not least, if you've been on this journey with us especially as a TWM Member or donor- THANK YOU!  We wouldn't be here without you!

A Woman's Table*

The following was originally posted on September 20, 2010. It is being re-posted as part of our CHICKS ROCK! Summer Retrospective.

Last week I went to the Brooklyn Museum to see The Dinner Party, created by Judy Chicago (and hundreds of volunteers), a landmark piece of feminist art from the late 1970's. Surprisingly, I had never heard of this piece, which is now on permanent exhibition as the centerpiece of the museum's Elizabeth Sackler Center for Feminist Art.

The Dinner Party is a large triangular table with dinner place settings for 39 women (real and mythical) who over the course of history have impacted feminism, women's rights, and/or the perception of women in the world. Each featured woman represents a cadre of women who made related contributions, and 999 additional names are scrawled on floor tiles in the center. Some represented include The Fertile Goddess, Hatshepsut, Sappho, Elizabeth I, Sojourner Truth, Virginia Woolf and Georgia O'Keefe.

Each place setting contains a unique plate and table runner styled to represent the individual woman's contribution, plus an identical fork, knife and goblet to represent the unity among them. The ceramic plates feature stylized butterfly/flower/vulva forms, and the intricately stitched table runners and ceramic work alike spotlight centuries of “unsigned” women’s art—the quilts, clothing, dishes and more that women have sewn, painted and created over time.

As with any piece of (woman-centered) art of this scale and attention, The Dinner Party was controversially received. Developed between 1974-1979, and debuted in San Francisco, it then existed without a permanent home for over two decades. Is this so surprising, given that women’s work and art has traditionally been pushed to the margins? Let alone a piece of women’s art designed to highlight that very history…

Personally, I found the piece impressive, intriguing and inspiring, but most of all--it begs a conversation. After all, what else is a dinner party for?

The Flaw in Films*

The following was originally posted on October 18, 2010. It is being re-posted as part of our CHICKS ROCK! Summer Retrospective.


It's possible that many of you are already familiar with the Bechdel Test for women in films, but I found this video by The Feminist Frequency about a surprising phenomenon occurring in many popular feature films today:



If you watched the video, you might not need to read the rest of my post, but here it goes anyway. The Bechdel Test asks three questions of any movie to determine the true presence of women on the screen:

1. Does the film have more than one woman in it (who has a name)?
2. Do they talk to each other at some point?
3. Do they talk about something other than a man?

The first time I heard of this, I felt sure I could immediately name plenty of movies that pass the test. Turned out, I could name some--not plenty--and they weren't always the movies I expected them to be. And it remains truly shocking to me how many of my favorites fail miserably.

How do your long-time favorites stack up? What about any new releases you've checked out lately? Any surprises?

MAD (Wo)MEN

I've recently been watching the television series MAD MEN for the first time. Ever since it debuted, friends have been telling me "Oh, it's so good. You should watch it. You'll enjoy it."

Now, I'm definitely a big t.v. fan--I watch way too much in general. I like dramas, I love history, of course I should be watching MAD MEN. But I never got into it. I caught an episode or two over time, and it always struck me as a lot of work, somehow. Not that the show was difficult to follow, but on a deeper level I found it a little bit hard to watch. From an artistic standpoint, it's a strong show, and one that I actually do want to experience...and yet....

I never gave it much thought, figuring, if I can live without getting hooked on yet another t.v. show, that's all the better for my life. But yesterday I caught an episode of Melissa Harris-Perry on MSNBC in which she brought up the cultural phenomenon of MAD MEN, and she talked about it in a way that finally made my relationship to the show make sense.

She said: MAD MEN romanticizes an era in which women, people of color, Jews, gays, etc. were treated horribly, yet rather than promoting outrage or even opening people's eyes, the show seems to be inspiring nostalgia for "the good old days" when life was so carefree and days were spent drinking and smoking in the office. Sure, she said, it's nice to think about how much has changed since then, but the more important question is why, at this moment in time, when we're all paying so much lipservice to diversity, are Americans wanting to harken back to "the good old days" of rampant sexism, racism, antisemitism and homophobia? Does a show like MAD MEN prove that these -isms still live closer to the surface than we think they do? Are we really comfortable fantasizing about how mean upper and middle class white men used to be to everyone else?

Television is about escapism, at least for me. I feel the same way about books and movies. Sure, non-fiction is great and sometimes I read or watch to be informed and to learn, but my preference is to be swept away into another world, lifted right out of my overly analytical brain and plopped into some fantasy. I can't do that with MAD MEN, because the world it projects is not a fantasy world to me. It's not a place to lose myself, it's a place where I feel guarded and on edge, and maybe that works for some viewers, but I use t.v. to relax and unwind. What scares me about Melissa Harris-Perry's perspective is that maybe others are using this show as escapism, too, and I don't like the feeling that we as a culture may still be fantasizing about this kind of lifestyle.

Now that I know how I feel about MAD MEN and why, I can put the show where it belongs in my own mind, a watch and enjoy it as such. But when I think about some of the political conversations that are going on right now in the real world (how much control should women really be allowed to have over their reproductive rights? is it okay to shoot an unarmed black teenager, no real reason need be given?) I think the question about what kind of society we are pushing toward is pretty valid.

What do you think? Do you watch MAD MEN? What makes it enjoyable for you?

Women and Children First

As a children's writer, I find myself contending with a lot of different social issues in my work. My personal background and my interests lead me toward topics that can be seen as controversial, especially when these writings are directed at young people.

I often write about race, and about characters with diverse racial backgrounds, and about the history of race relations in America. I sometimes write about sexuality, and teen characters experiencing first romances, dealing with attraction and coming to understand their sexual orientation. I write both boy and girl characters, and sometimes I face questions about what it means to be a woman and write from a boy's perspective.

All of these issues--race, sexuality, gender--fall under the larger umbrella of "identity," which is what a lot of literature (especially young adult literature) deals with. Thus, I spend most of my time thinking about how these issues are portrayed through my characters, within the life of my novels. I spend much less time thinking about how they affect me as a writer.

To be more specific, perhaps I should say that I spend less time thinking about how they affect me professionally. Of course I think about race and gender and sexuality in my own life as a human person, but I've never been the type to consider myself at a disadvantage because of where I stand in the world based on my gender or the color of my skin.

Last week I published an article online with VIDA: Women in Literary Arts about gender and children's literature, in which I took time to reflect upon the social significance of being a woman who writes for children. Here is the article. I came out of the experience of writing the piece feeling great about what I do, but not so great about the place children's literature currently holds in the world. Most children's writers are women, and I think that plays a role in why this culture looks at children's literature as simple and not worthy of much respect. So much of women's work--essential work, like raising and educating children--is looked down upon and disrespected, and that really needs to change. The sooner the better.

Have you ever stopped to think about how gender impacts you in your job or profession? Or, is it obvious? Do you feel the impact every day?

Victimizing Victims With Blame

Like most people, I find myself getting angry when I hear about people who are physically assaulted at their workplaces, schools, and other places that are familiar to them. I was disgusted when I read the report about the former heard of the International Monetary Fund who is accused of attempting to rape a maid who went to his room to clean it, and then boarded a plane back to his native France the same day; thankfully the authorities stopped him from leaving. I know he is innocent until proven guilty, but when I heard that the maid is a Guinean immigrant and a devout Muslim who wears a traditional headscarf, I became even more concerned. Why? Because in addition to her being in a service-related position where there is little safety for the workers, she must also wrestle feelings of violation and guilt. I don’t want to generalize, but I know that in my parents’ culture, it is still widely believed that women are to blame for any sexual violence they endure.

I found out a few years ago that a former family friend of my Mother’s was raped in a hospital parking lot several decades ago; she worked at that hospital as a nurse. She won a considerable settlement from her employers, but never went to therapy. When I knew her, she was very judgmental and constantly angry. Even with the money, I now know that it did not buy her peace of mind, even though she and her family had the best of everything. Her desire to pretend that the past did not happen for the sake of her traditional beliefs and to fit into her cultural community became everything to her.

While I am respectful of all cultures and religions, I will never understand when a woman or man is forcibly attacked by others and blamed for it. It is a further victimization of the victim, and that is unacceptable. Patience, compassion, and love should always be used by anyone with a family member or friend who goes through this ordeal.

The Flaw in Films

It's possible that many of you are already familiar with the Bechdel Test for women in films (I've also heard it called the Mo Movie Measure), but I found this video by The Feminist Frequency about a surprising phenomenon occurring in many popular feature films today:



If you watched the video, you might not need to read the rest of my post, but here it goes anyway. The Bechdel Test asks three questions of any movie to determine the true presence of women on the screen:

1. Does the film have more than one woman in it (who has a name)?
2. Do they talk to each other at some point?
3. Do they talk about something other than a man?

The first time I heard of this, I felt sure I could immediately name plenty of movies that pass the test. Turned out, I could name some--not plenty--and they weren't always the movies I expected them to be. And it remains truly shocking to me how many of my favorites fail miserably.

How do your long-time favorites stack up? What about any new releases you've checked out lately? Any surprises?

A Women's Table

Last week I went to the Brooklyn Museum to see The Dinner Party, created by Judy Chicago (and hundreds of volunteers), a landmark piece of feminist art from the late 1970's. Surprisingly, I had never heard of this piece, which is now on permanent exhibition as the centerpiece of the museum's Elizabeth Sackler Center for Feminist Art.

The Dinner Party is a large triangular table with dinner place settings for 39 women (real and mythical) who over the course of history have impacted feminism, women's rights, and/or the perception of women in the world. Each featured woman represents a cadre of women who made related contributions, and 999 additional names are scrawled on floor tiles in the center. Some represented include The Fertile Goddess, Hatshepsut, Sappho, Elizabeth I, Sojourner Truth, Virginia Woolf and Georgia O'Keefe.

Each place setting contains a unique plate and table runner styled to represent the individual woman's contribution, plus an identical fork, knife and goblet to represent the unity among them. The ceramic plates feature stylized butterfly/flower/vulva forms, and the intricately stitched table runners and ceramic work alike spotlight centuries of “unsigned” women’s art—the quilts, clothing, dishes and more that women have sewn, painted and created over time.

As with any piece of (woman-centered) art of this scale and attention, The Dinner Party was controversially received. Developed between 1974-1979, and debuted in San Francisco, it then existed without a permanent home for over two decades. Is this so surprising, given that women’s work and art has traditionally been pushed to the margins? Let alone a piece of women’s art designed to highlight that very history…

Personally, I found the piece impressive, intriguing and inspiring, but most of all--it begs a conversation. After all, what else is a dinner party for?

Sorry, Oscar. Still Grouching...

I've been reflecting on my previous post, about Kathryn Bigelow as the first Academy Award-winning female director. I keep trying to figure out why this particular “first” felt so distressing to me. This is what I landed on:

I've always thought of Academy Awards for women and Academy Awards for men in the same breath. On the acting side, women are always nominated, and women always win because we have our own categories. I take this in stride, but now I’m forced to wonder: does having separate categories imply that you can't compare what women do with what men do? Is there an inherent inequality there?

Women steal the focus on the red carpet, but are asked to discuss what we're wearing. Men fade into the background, brought forth to talk about their actual work. Vera Farmiga gets asked what it was like working with George Clooney on Up in the Air, while George gets asked what drew him to the character he played. If male and female actors were judged together, would women ever be nominated, or would we simply get to be someone's date? Would a woman have won best actor by now, or would we still be waiting? Would the lack of recognition in other categories have been called to wider attention, and rectified, sooner?

Perhaps I shouldn't be surprised that women are still experiencing major "firsts." I admit that I come and go from the land of feminism. I want equality, and I'm willing to argue over it and I believe I'm willing to fight for it, too, but most of the time I feel like the world is working well enough for me.

In my most cynical moments this week, I wondered if we weren't better off in the days of overt, rampant sexism, a la Mad Men, because at least then we knew what we were up against. At least then sexism didn't sneak up on you like a mosquito--just when you think you imagined the buzzing, there comes the welt. I don't really believe that women were better off before, but I hate that blind-sided feeling when I stumble on problems I should’ve been aware of all along, I just didn't see them.

Equality: Personal & Political

I’m sure many of you know this already, but yesterday was International Women’s Day. Every year on March 8, various organizations, governments, and people around the world plan events, campaigns, days of action, and so forth to celebrate the advancement of women and to plan for the future. The United Nations chooses a theme each year, and this year’s theme was “Equal rights, equal opportunities: Progress for all.”

When I heard this year’s theme, I thought it was an interesting one. For those who don’t know, this year marks the 15th Anniversary of the Fourth World Conference on Women held in Beijing. This conference set up goals for countries around the world to improve women’s rights and this year various organizations have put out reports and documents tracking how far we’ve come, and how far we still have to go. I’m pretty sure the U.N. had this somewhere in their minds when they came up with this year’s theme.

But we can also look at this theme in a different way. Rather than simply looking at it as a reflection on politics, we can make it personal: as a commitment to the future not only for the world but for ourselves. Last week, I attended Women Hold the Solutions, an event hosted by Global Fund for Women. One of the panelists spoke about how difficult it is to raise children to be equal. Because parents themselves are products of societies where not everything is equal, they pass those ideas on to their children without realizing it. Around the world, mothers might find themselves demanding more from their daughters in terms of housework and chores, or urging their sons to take on more wives. Similarly, most of us do the same thing when we’re around our friends and families. We don’t expect or demand equality in all areas, so progress will always be that much slower.

I plan on taking some more time this Women’s History Month to think about how we can advance equality on all fronts. Just because International Women’s Day is over doesn’t mean we can’t keep it in mind for longer.

Women Warriors Part II

CHICKS ROCK! is happy to have Kristina back as a guest blogger this week:

Kristina Leonardi is the founder of The Women’s Mosaic. She is a career/life path consultant, speaker, seminar leader and expert in the areas of women, diversity and personal growth.

Join her at TWM's Visioning Workshop this Saturday, March 28. See her speak for free April 4 at Equinox when she presents: Spring Cleaning for the Soul.


In our Spring TWM eNewsletter, I thank the Women Warriors of the past for getting us to a place where we can now truly be whoever we want to be regardless of our gender. I think we are entering into another phase of being ‘women warriors’ in the broadest sense of the word - we are fighting for the right to live the lives we want – for our ability to be in touch with our deepest desires and having the courage to obtain them; to express who we are and what we want in a most unapologetic way.

I’d like to think of the term “warrior” here as a concept for forging our own path, regardless of what the outside world is telling us we should or should not be doing, can or cannot achieve. Now is the time to fight for your Self to fully exist. It is a time to be strong and fight for yourself like a mother bear would fight for her cub; to make your life your own, a work of art; to craft and shape it in the way that suits you best and fits your own personal definition of beauty, fulfillment and happiness. Only when we do that can we really become warriors for others, which won't always have to be in an external way - simply by exercising our right to be who we are allows others to do the same.

It has taken years of struggle and sacrifice from thousands of women warriors before us to push through to this point, where we can be the full contributors to society we are meant to be. Let us be so grateful that we do not have to deal with the severe limitations of the past and can determine our own destiny in every area of our lives.

As I mentioned in my previous post, now is a great time to do some self-reflection and find a treasure trove of strength, talent and resources we never knew we had. Make the most of this opportunity and gift that you have been given from our foremothers - make yourself better, fight for who you are, what you love, what you want to do, what you believe in. Fight the good fight, but fight for yourself, your individuality first and foremost, and all else will follow...

Friday Forum: Building Movements

As we continue Women's History Month, we want to reflect on the activists who came before us and got us to where we are now.

With that in mind, how connected are you to the feminist/womanist/humanist movement? Do you identify with any of these labels? Why or why not?

Shedding Labels

There has been a lot of buzz around the feminist blogosphere lately about the divisions within the feminist movement, and how that is creating a rift among feminist bloggers as well.

I've considered myself a feminist for as long as I can remember, and I've been a proud, active member of the feminist blogosphere for a couple of years now. But for the past year or so, a lot of negativity has started to fester. The election season created an "us vs. them" mentality between supporters of the various candidates. A couple of very popular women of color (WOC) faced racism and felt isolated from the rest of the mainstream (mostly white) bloggers. These and several other episodes have left many, including myself, feeling uneasy and, to some extent, even unwelcome.

More than anything, what this has done for me is make me seriously question the label "feminist." While I recognize that you do not need the label in order to take action and fight for the causes important to you, there is a sense of community - however broken it might be - and togetherness. It's good to know that in an endless fight like women's rights, there are people behind you who share a common goal.

But what happens when the people around you who are supposed to be providing support also end up saying and doing things that you consider racist, homophobic, ableist, etc.? At what point do you say enough is enough and find a new crew or just fly solo?

I still feel deeply connected to the label "feminist," even with everything that's been going on. It has long been the only label I willingly use to describe myself and the only pigeonhole I've accepted regardless of the negative stereotypes associated with it. Can I really let go of something that has defined me for so long? It feels like cutting off my arm or denying an identity I've claimed my whole life.

What are some labels you've left behind and how did you feel once you let it go?

Women In Politics Have To Do It Better And Smarter In The Future

Even though we are in the final stretch of presidential election season, I am still sad that there will be no woman president this time around. It was exciting when Senator Hillary Clinton of NY ran for the Democratic nomination against Senator Barack Obama of Illinois. I remember being excited before the first televised debate between Clinton, Obama, and Edwards. By the end of the debate, my high expectations were dashed. I still admire the Senator from New York immensely... I remember how calm and collected Clinton was back in 2000, when she ran for Senate against Rick Lazio. She blew her opponent away with her determination to focus on the issues, while Lazio resorted to aggressive tactics that reeked of sexism and personal insecurity. I wanted to see those same admirable qualities in her debates against Obama. Instead, I was disappointed by her lackluster performance, due mostly to the Illinois senator’s charisma and strong showing in the polls. Even though the race was close for months after this debate, I knew in my heart that Clinton would not be the Democratic candidate for president.

It is like the Wild West during contentious political campaigns, and we still haven’t seen enough women taking on prominent roles in the showdowns that often erupt in the media and on the campaign trail. In 2004, The Women’s Mosaic hosted a unique panel called "Politics Schmolitics!" which featured some fascinating politically active women, and I believe that we need more them to make significant impacts on the political battlegrounds in this country. Valerie Kennedy, an attorney, lobbyist, political consultant, and legislative counsel for Congressman Tim Valentine from North Carolina, made the greatest impact on me during the event when she said that it was "the lack of mentoring and promoting women that is the greatest challenge in politics." Four years later, these words still ring true. Even though we are the majority in this country, we have to organize and support each other much more, especially when navigating the shark-infested political waters in all levels of government.

The next woman to wage a successful presidential campaign will have to appeal to the masses, be cool under fire, and have a diverse and dynamic understanding of domestic and international policies. Clinton fell short on appeal in her campaign, and Governor Sarah Palin of Alaska just doesn’t fit the bill. These two prominent female characters of the 2008 U.S. Presidential Election season will hopefully inspire aspiring women politicians to do it better and smarter in the future.

What qualities do you think a woman should possess if she is to become President of the United States? Should she be held to different standards because of gender?

When in Zambia...

In April, I participated in a trip to Zambia, a nation in Southern Africa. I traveled with a group of nine – four men and five women. In advance of the trip, we were instructed on culturally-appropriate social behavior. The expectations for men and women were vastly different. We were told that women must wear skirts at all times in public. Shoulders must be covered. When shaking the hand of a man her age or older, a woman must grip her own forearm, bow her head and bend her knees in a curtsy to show respect. We practiced this move on each other, finding it mildly amusing, maybe patronizing, and more than a little bit sexist. But we knew we would do it because it was not our place to judge. We were to be guests in their homes, and when in Rome…yeah.

So we curtsied, over and over. Most shockingly, in the moment, in that time and place, it ceased to be amusing, patronizing or sexist. It simply was. And especially watching the Zambian women move through their world, we American women realized that things may not always be as they seem from afar. When we look across the oceans at the lives they lead, we’re looking through the lens of our own history, our own lives, our own brand of feminism. None of those things leave as much room for interpretation as they should.

I expected that I would observe timidity and deference among the Zambian women. Instead, they showed me what it means to be confident in your role and place in the world. I expected that always wearing skirts might make them feel stifled, but they moved so freely you would never know it wasn’t necessarily their choice of garment. I never doubted that Zambian women would be strong, but I didn’t expect that strength to be so visible and unapologetic. Even though they bow before their men, they are anything but powerless.

Sisterhood on the Inca Trail

I was scared and excited when my friend first suggested the Inca Trail and Machu Picchu in Peru last December. I do love walking, but the idea of camping outside, mountain trails and high altitudes really intimidated me. At the same time I was enthralled by the idea of mountain views, forests, and valleys all around me…and all that clean air. I agreed to the plan immediately, hoping that I would conquer my fear of the unknown.


My preparation for the trip consisted of some time on a treadmill and my participation in the Revlon Run/Walk in New York City as a TWM member. As personally rewarding as the 5K race was for me, nothing could prepare me for the 45 km hike, with three high mountain passes (one of which reaches to an elevation of 13,776 ft). When we met with our tour organizers in Lima, Peru, we found out that there would be no men among us, except for the guides, porters and chefs. They were going to Machu Picchu by train! I was surprised and little anxious…what would it be like on the Inca Trail with other women?

I often lagged behind the others in my tour group, but they never judged me for my “slow and steady” pace…at least not to my face. When we huddled around the dinner table in the main tent every night, I felt a comradery with my fellow hikers that was not hindered by differences in personality, nationality or race... we were all going to make it to Machu Picchu, no matter what. When we finally did, I knew that one of the reasons was our sisterhood on the Inca Trail. Yes, the guides and porters were mostly responsible for our success, and we had to move our aching bodies up and down the rocky paths, but it was also the kinship we had with each other that made our final day a joyous occasion. I may never see them again, but I will always remember my fellow trekkers on the Inca Trail.

Breaking Out of the Box

I've often wondered: What's the point of labels anyway? Conservative or liberal… black or white… gay or straight… man or woman… As if we're all one thing or another, rather than a point on a scale that changes with time. As if we all fit in tidy little boxes that always look the same inside and out.

I've never been a big fan of labels. Ever since high school, I've been silently protesting them whenever I see the word "Optional" next to a question asking me to check the appropriate box. The only label I've ever been comfortable giving myself is "Feminist" because it always grows with me.

Perhaps that is what drew me to The Women's Mosaic.

As an immigrant from the Dominican Republic, and the oldest of three daughters, I grew up very sheltered. Whether or not we have ended up with the "American Dream" can be debated, but living here has caused a great disconnect in my beliefs or passions, and those I am supposed to have.

With The Women's Mosaic, I was suddenly able to connect with women of various backgrounds who were open and eager to share their range of experiences. These women were also not afraid to say they don't fit into boxes and admit they can't live their lives according to traditional labels. You can never know just by looking at someone at a TWM event what their story will be. I LOVE THAT!

So hopefully you're okay with the fact that you'll never really be able to figure me out, because I am. And hopefully you didn't already start preparing a box just because I call myself a feminist — you may need to throw that out.

Though, if you insist on keeping me in the box, make it a nice, bright, colorful one with a big purple bow on top!