Tuesday, January 6, 2009

A Gutsy Resolution

CHICKS ROCK! readers are no strangers to my struggles with finding my voice and owning it. That, coupled with my other major struggle to focus on myself, has led to a very nebulous yet incredibly important resolution for this new year: to listen to myself.

Being silenced by several people throughout my life has gotten me in the habit of silencing myself. Rather than just doing it during regular, spoken communication with others, I am realizing more and more that I've been doing it to my own inner voice. I find myself looking back in situation after situation and thinking to myself "I should've trusted my gut." For me, a life of regrets is simply not an option, and that's the road I see myself going down if I keep betraying my instincts.

So this year, I want to listen to myself as much as I can. When my body is hungry, when my brain needs a break, when my muscles are sore, when work is taking all of my energy, I will listen to myself. If I am uncomfortable, happy, sad, disappointed, or overwhelmed by unclear emotions, I will be honest with myself and others about how I'm feeling. And when faced with difficult decisions or feelings of ambivalence, I will go with my gut.

As with anything, I'm sure this is much easier said than done. Thankfully, I've got people around me who will constantly check on me to see how I'm progressing. Even though it's in some ways a very personal resolution, I know I can't do it completely alone.

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